Mother’s Day for Parents of Children with Disabilities

Mother’s Day…a day when moms are honored and recognized. The flower and candy areas of the grocery and big box stores are emptied, and every child will bring home some kind of handmade gift for his or her mom. All “good” dads (the ones that want to stay out of trouble) will make sure mom has some kind of recognition from each child or the children as a whole. As the children grow and become more independent, it becomes their personal responsibility to recognize mom on this day of honor. There are more phone calls made on this day than any other holiday during the year.

Every mom has received handmade gifts and cards from their little ones before the gifts change to more practical. Sometimes the gifts may stop. The little ones mom loved and adored and gave up so much for have grown up and have other interests and priorities. They still love their mommas, hence the phone calls.

Allow me to share the advantage of being the mom of an adult child with special needs on Mother’s Day. He will not forget for a moment to let me know how much he loves me on that day (and every other day of the year). I will receive at least two gifts and two cards from him. One of the gifts and cards will be something he made for me at the community center he attends five days a week for adults with special needs. The other gift and card will be one he purchased after pestering his dad to take him shopping. He will want to cook for me, and he and Daddy may attempt something every couple of years, but usually he can be convinced to eat out.

Now this may sound like a typical Mother’s Day, but remember my adult child is the youngest…he’s my baby and will forever be my baby, and as long as he lives, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day will be celebrated in our home as if he were a six-year-old child. Most moms my age are receiving a card, phone call, or gift card, but I am receiving the shining eyes and giggles of anticipation as I open the cards and gifts my man-child has for me. He will come to me before he goes to bed that night and take my hands up to his chest, look in my eyes and ask again, “Did you like it? Is that what you wanted? I love you, Mommy.”

I know you do, Baby, I know you do.

Stacy has been married 30+ years to David and they are the caregivers to their 25-year-old son and her 55-year-old brother with Down syndrome and Alzheimers. They are as active as possible in their church family of 20+ years. David enjoys piddling in the garage and Stacy enjoys cooking, reading, and napping when possible.